Spring, Texas; January 22, 2013

It has been awhile since I've been out here.  Life has gotten in the way a little bit.  So back to making an effort to reflect and challenge myself going forward.

Since the last time I checked in, I've turned a year older.  46.  Can't be all that bad, right?  Let's hope not.  I don't feel it at all, and I'm thankful for that.

As I have mentioned before, this devotional from Tony Dungy, "Uncommon Life:  Daily Challenge", is what I've been using to guide my writings and thought processes.

Today's heading was this:  "Just say a simple, "Yes, I will," or "No, I won't."  Anything beyond this is from the evil one."  Matthew 5:37.

Dungy is talking about honesty in his book, but I read further down in my King James Version Bible to verse 44.

It says, "But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;"

That's tough to do, but sometimes it is the only way to combat those feelings of anger and disappointment overwhelm you.

In church this past Sunday, I continue to pray for somebody for what they have experienced in life and asked God to show His love to them.

So an interesting mental sidebar, but back to honesty.

I've struggled with this only in the areas of being fearful and when I think others won't fully understand my actions.

Dungy wrote, "Honesty is a component of a person's character that is remembered far longer than an individual's words, talents, or accomplishments.  All those things can carry a person to a point, but ultimately, without honing that deep core of honest, they will all be for naught."

In the "Uncommon Key", Dungy added, "Being less than honest with others will permanently mark your character if you don't change."

I'll say that there have been a few people that again I didn't think at the moment in time would understand where I was in my life and why I was where I was in that instant that I was communicating with them.  Therefore, I didn't tell the story as it was.

Yes, it was wrong of me.  One I eventually told.  The other I have distanced myself from - and it isn't anything that they've done wrong.  They're a great person and one that I clearly don't measure up to.

This past Saturday, I had lunch with a friend who I think may have had a question in their mind about me personally.  When they had asked me questions in the past, I had answered them truthfully, but very, very narrowly in such a way that they interpreted my life status as one thing because that is actually how I lived my life day to day.

However, the paperwork was something that was still actually different.

Situations in our lives allowed us to spend a little time together getting caught up and in an earlier e-mail communication, I had told them that I wanted to clear up any "grey areas".

I did.  I sat across the table from them, looked them in the eye and told them the truth.

They're more than willing to ask me any question at any time in the future because I have nothing to hide from them, nor do I want to.  I want this individual to trust me the way that they originally did.

As I do with others.

The end of Matthew 5 (verse 48) says, "Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect."  That's the standard to strive for.

And when we fall short, God gives us another chance - if we choose to exercise it - to be honest with Him in seeking forgiveness for our sin.